Anywhere you go, let me go too

Who am I to tell you that you're mine?

With not enough reasons to live,

Why do you blame me for wanting to go?

I can't see you with her anymore. I can't breathe when I'm around you. I think of thousands of ways to dispose of me, my feelings, my uncertainty, my abandonment. How come you're not here to save me? Why did you leave me to die? Why aren't you here with me, trying to forget the world by my side... If love meant so little, then why allow me to believe in it?

I'm scared, why aren't you here? Why can't you hear me when I call you? Why... why did you stop loving me? if you ever did... I don't belong where you are.

But I'm strong and I can pretend. I wish I wasn't pathetic and I wish I had you with me to tell me that I'll make it in one piece, that you'll love me no matter what. I'm scared. I'm so scared.

Why am I so lost without you? I am nothing, no one without you.

So please... don't leave me.

My little piece of happiness, my little ray of hope... I can't die first. I can close my eyes, I can drown out all the sounds, I can stop crying and I'll live among my memories of you. When you cared, when you truly loved me. Even if you weren't supposed to, you were mine and will remain that way forever. I want to go now. Somewhere far, far away, where nothing that I see will remind me of you. Where I can begin to let go... at least some part of you.

I need a lot of ice cream right now... and cigarettes. Lots and lots of cigarettes.